Do you think I am very intelligent and academically gifted?  Please let me know.   I am a grateful recovering alcoholic.   I am very intelligent and smart because I have a lot of resources and common sense.   I graduated from the University of Toledo in Toledo Ohio with my Associates Degree in Applied Sciences in Social Services Technology and my Bachelors Degree in Interdisciplinary Studies on Saturday June 17, 1995.  I was told as a child that I was wise beyond my years.  I know that I tend to struggle with complacency and procrastinating especially when it comes to performance and understanding towards other people.  I want everyone to know that I have been evicted out of my apartment at Wentworth Hi Rise Apartments in Dayton Ohio on Tuesday January 21, 2025 for fighting with one of my neighbors.  My brother stated that I have been writing since 1993.  My brother and sister told me that they have been responsible for using my college notes to study with them.  I have been writing for over 35 years now.   I am very happy to realize that God still loves me.   God Loves me and He is always with me.   In spite of my sins.   Please pray for me and my entire family members and friends because I have been suffering from Schizoid Affective Disorder for 28 years now.  My mother told me before she died that I was the Leader in the Entire Family.   My half siblings doesn’t agree with her.   My half siblings always disrespect me as a person for 55 years now.  My elders in my family members told me that I am the Leader in the Entire Family.   Frankly,  I am very intelligent and academically gifted myself.   My allegiance is with God & Jesus Christ and then with other people right now.   What do you really think about me as a person?  My nieces and nephews do not respect me anymore.   My family members and friends had been bullied by other people who have hurt issues.  My mother had changed my name when I was a child just to hurt me.   My name used to be Anthony Joseph Russell for 13 years.  My mother had given me her husband’s last name.  My brother does not want to live with me anymore.   He blames me for losing his job at Fuyao Glass Company America because I wanted to walk him to the bus stop.  I know that I tend to struggle with self doubt and I have been clean and sober for 35 years now.   My siblings resent me as a person. I have forgiven everyone who used to beat me up all of the time because I was smaller than them. My mother and two grandmothers raised me for 13 years.  My grandparents house was always my sanctuary and I loved going over there.   Everything I talk about my personal past, it makes me cry all of the time. I know that I do not have anything to show for myself.  My nieces and nephews are doing better than I am.  I got turned down for a job working at Speedway Convenient Store because I have a criminal record right now.  The Store Manager stated that they selected someone else for the job.  I know that I have a criminal record right now.  The only three places that I literally loved visiting was Church ⛪️,  The Public Library in Dayton, Ohio and my  Grandparents house 🏠.  My Grandparents raised me and they saved my life.  Life itself is what you really make of it.  My half siblings and I do not speak to each other anymore because I am not used to success like they are.  I graduated from high school 🏫 and college twice. I will admit that I had been a school truancy person for 6 years.  I am very happy to have completed 235 college credit hours from the University of Toledo in Toledo Ohio and Central State University in Wilberforce, Ohio which is 26 miles from Dayton, Ohio.   This is a Black College in the State of Ohio. I want to say that my life matters to me.   My life matters to God and Jesus Christ.